New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
i think i left my bra at your place
It's still hanging from my ceiling fan. Please let me keep it there.
The cab driver had me sign for the payment and I was like give me a second while I throw up right outside your door.
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
Its not low standards. We're more of like a self esteem camp for average girls
On 3 separate occasions, she grabbed my bullhorn to announce to the entire party she had fucked me.
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Well its all fun and games until you get naked with your ex in the shower. that's NOT flirting
When I go to hand him the blunt and he's eating a cookie and responds with "let me hit this cookie"
She passed out in my baby sister's room so we put her in one of my grandma's diapers, put a pacifier in her mouth, put her in my sister's crib and took pictures.
Randomize
