Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
we found him. outside on the balcony, sitting on a bucket, with his pants off, swearing he was'nt taking a dump
Dude, you disappeared somewhere on the walk back and shortly after we got a call from your cell phone from this guy explaining that him and his roommates woke up to the smell of burning pizza and a naked stranger on their couch.
Dude this deaf chick is totally hot, I just bought an apartment on boner ave
Kriste-san. Brian-sensai going to sleepy times acturry. Kriste-grasshopper will spend fun-fun times with Brian-sensai and glorious redbox movie tomorrow yes?
Most creative movie date proposition... ever.
Someone had written "Boxmonsterette" on the bathroom wall and I just knew you'd been here.
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
Vodka and cigarettes aside, my body is a temple.
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
I remember the Prince Albert and the three penises in the threesome. But the rest no.
Just got hit on by a 28-year old, quadraplegic, triple-cancer-survivor redneck. Now updating bucket list to meet newfound standards.
He was someone so memorable that I'd completely forgotten he'd existed up to and during the encounter
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