I'm telling lies about you to make you look like a good person
How many 'remember name' entries is it inappropriate to have in one's cell phone?
shes a 6ft ginger. she brings nothing to the table except for awkwardness
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
ummm i just drove by ur house and ur passed out on the porch. please call me when u get this
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
University has ruined us all. I just had to clarify the last time I had sex as "No, not at the party we crawled home from in the snow. It was the one where you puked off the balcony and hit the barbecue."
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Your mother may get texts again about women putting dog food up their vaginas and asking for it to be licked.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
What doesn't this kid understand that our relationship is not going past the blacked out blowjob I gave him on his birthday?
Randomize
