as veruca salt said, "i want it now!"
uhh im not your indulgent father, stoned and im in the middle of making tacos. right now, tacos win
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
I spent a lot of time in their kitchen cause I was convinced that the living room was gonna fall... Sorry for not warning you about that.
I just soaked a sugar cookie in nail polish remover to clean off my nails because I was too lazy to walk to the bathroom to get a cotton ball. Is this what rock bottom feels like?
Oh and an honorable mention for your father's porn collection. Things I'll never forget.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
We were playing fuck marry kill and he was eavesdropping so I said I would fuck him
It was like catching dick in a barrel
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