then i got kicked out of the bar for trying to pay my $30 bar tab in sacajawea dollar coins
my head feels like I tried to put alcohol out of business last night
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
If u were an xman, what would ur power be? I would shoot lasers from my boobs.
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
She gives the worst handjobs, it was like raw meat on a cheese grater
I'm currently looking on facebook to see how slutty the girls from my kindergarden class are now. I have a problem.
The cop used the word "belligerent" 16 times in the report. You get to bail him this time. I'm not up for it.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I slept naked with a towel wrapped around my waist in case I pissed the bed again
So you've been sexting me while spending time with your family
I'm a family man but I have priorities
He bent me in ways I couldn't imagine.. and im a gymnast.
Randomize
