I just found that girl ____ on facebook, her activities include "church nursery" yikes
I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
my weekend in 10 words or less: hot friend of a friend, open bar, beach house, sore. In that order too.
is it sad that i can masturbate and get my big O just from thinking about a Tiffany engagement ring?
and when i screamed you came in my eye, i found out that everyone else in the room had only pretneded to be sleeping
Just saw the liqour store owner get into a mercedes, almost proud to be responsible for that
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
"Yeah because the first thing I think of when I hear the word college is tear gas."
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
It's something you'd find in the room outside of Ben Carson's sex dungeon
You didn't throw up on me, you threw up on yourself and then tried to give me a hug
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
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