It is pretty awful out and I still haven't put on pants yet.
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
in the middle of fucking he asked me if i had gotten a haircut because he noticed i didnt have split ends anymore. i dont know what to think
Hey hey, in my defense we were just suppose to watch Disney movies from a blanket fort with beer and nachos. I was I suppose to know it would end in tears?
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Most men with as many freckles as you aren't vagina magnets. You are an exception to your kind.
This hurricane better not stop me from sitting on the stoop thurs & enjoying all the slutty costume walkofshamers
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
I woke up naked with a Jason mask on and a fat lip. What happened last night?
Randomize
