Dude it was awful. I woke up with more strippers in my dorm room than those duke lacrosse kids.
My cousin just asked what abortion is. Happy Holidays.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
As he was under the stripper backwards, he yelled "we should totally be facebook friends"
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Leaving your birthday party to engage in a threesome IS allowed. I checked the rule book.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
I don't know how guys can take themselves seriously when they see themselves naked
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I stole the butter cup cuz i brought home my rolls and chicken and didnt want the butter everywhere. I miss your body because its amazing.
just ran into my father at CVS while buying condoms...he winked at me. I really need to move out of this town.
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
Randomize
