That girl would be great looking if she lost 1000 pounds and cut off her head.
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
Listen, Pinot Grigio got me pregnant. It can get you a boyfriend.
He locked about 20 beers in a suitcase and put it in the fridge. For a complete idiot, he's a goddamn genius.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
I just figured you know how to drive a boat and I know how to get drunk. What can go wrong
Im covered in vodka and melted gummys. Fuck summer.
allie, at least he made an effort and braided his goatee.
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I don't even have his number. I have his pants tho
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I think I hear the ice cream truck
I could be going crazy though
NO IT IS THE ICE CREAM TRUCK IT'S ALMOST AT YOUR STOP
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
Randomize
