Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
I woke up at 3am naked and stroking a watermelon.
Fucking freshmen need to learn how to puke in the bushes outside the dorm and not in the fucking elevator.
Hey that girl we tagged team last night invited me to her birthday on Facebook, remind me to be sick that day.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
Some girl just walked passed me, said "fuck yeah!" and is now crawling up the stairs
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
The 4th is next week. If we don't get to a new level of high, we will be letting down George Washington.
My stripper pole led lights flash with the sound so it's awsome with music
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
I'm going to ride your dick until it falls off. That horny.
I'm equal parts terrified and turned on. Come over.
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
Randomize
