he said he didn't have a condom.
and you said?
that that's fine cause i was ready to be a mom. yeah - he magically had a condom he forgot about after that.
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Jake just asked if thanksgiving was an american thing...I left the table
those are the first brownies ive had since i was 13 that didnt have weed in them.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
This dude was wearing a "Plan B- One Step" backpack. I wonder how many more I have to buy until I get mine??
My tits, and hanging out behind a hotel eating pizza.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
I've somehow found myself in an emotionally abusive relationship with a married man who gives me drugs.
My life is quickly turning into a Lifetime movie.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Double-fisting ice cream and wine. Do not send help.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize