he promised me brunch in the morning so i felt like it was ok....i really need to get a job.
I GOT MY PERIOD!
damn. i had names picked out.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
One date. That's all it took. I want to have his geunis babies in me. One date.
I've spent more money on drugs for bonnaroo than my actual ticket. Proudly.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I have officially made out with every girl you've made out with, even the random you met on the Mexico flight
Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
At the end of the date, he asked if he could kiss me. I really wanted to say "dude, I didn't shave for nothing"
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
He's a snuggler. Every time I attempt to make a move to find my bra he reigns me in. Needless to say i could be here a while.
Tequila shots and throwing it at a bell.
This is dumb. I'll keep doing it.
Randomize
