I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
He was a bulldog and my face was like rare meat. Never again with the drunken ones.
No work today. I woke up and someone had written "Markhot Penis = Party" on my forehead in sharpie. Do you know a Mark?
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
Package arrived for me from the gf while she's on vacation..under the bed bondage kit and new lingerie...my boner could drive to the airport
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I spent last night dying strippers pubes green and landscaping shamrocks. That is why hands look like I squashed a leprechaun.
I think he has some internal "man stuff" that keeps getting in the way.
Like alcoholism and general douchbagary.
Of two things I'm absolutely sure: 1. I only took 2 hits off that joint and 2. I definitely ran over hedwig on the way home
I peed in Andys sink the other day bc I didnt want him to hear me pee
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
I am cleaning melted cheese out of my hair. This is a new experience for me
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