but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
i was blowing him and "what if god was one of us" came on his playlist. I had to leave
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
You make shower sex sound like waterboarding
when we got back we had sex. but it wasnt til the morning that i figured out her leg was broken
I have jerked off in every room in your house. *the more you know
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
I have a 16 minute video of you talking about your life. We are calling it your Anthology sponsored by Steel Reserve
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
If he doesn't give you the same feelings you get when the pizza guy arrives, he's probably not worth it.
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
Did he hurt you? I have a crowbar I can beat his sorry ass with
so i put my jacket on last night that you wore last weekend, and reach inside the pockets and find them full of goldfish...
the snack that smiles back:)
On the plus side, he ate me out and gave me an orgasm. But he also talked about robots during sex and mispronounced it like the dad in the goldbergs and called them “robits”
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