They wont let us in. Theyve some sort of no Daft Punk costume rule
I wanna be on tlc
Impossible. You are neither fat, fertile or fashionless.
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
MTV Made just made me cry. Where have all of my life goals gone?
I pulled down his boxers and a 20 dollar bill fell out. I'm telling you, the blowjob fairy EXISTS
i can't sleep with him. he has a scrapbook from the girl he lost his virginity to.
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
Look, all I'm saying is that you're going to be a great Vodka Mom.
No, I'm not a weirdo, I keep bondage straps under my matress like a normal person, not a diary.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
Florida is balancing how much this place sucks with how many vodkas you can have to cope in order to still be allowed on the plane to leave
Randomize
