I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
His little brother walked in on us. Six times.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
The required reading for this week is a paper about birds called great tits. Let's see my TA keep a straight face through this discussion.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
You should make cookies and when I get home we can have a slow motion hug and eat them
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
Randomize
