So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
I understand. Hypothetically what should one do after throwing up in the shower?
Tell your boyfriend I'm sorry for ruining his vein. I'm never drawing blood drunk again.
She just kept screaming you name over and over. Im starting to think this is my alarm clock
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I have pink band-aids all over my body, WHAT HAPPENED?
Keg backpack and a Bike
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
She followed me back, then proceeded to find my room, get her panda suit on? And then raid my room and pass out on my couch... what the fack do I do now?!?!
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
Randomize