no more stoned jack in the box. this is the third night in a row.
my FASA form asked what i spent the majority of my 08 earnings on, im tempted to put "booze, blow, & blunts"
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
the trick is not to think about where her tounge has been.
Oh my god please beg your father to turn the car around so you can possibly get laid by a knight at medieval times.
I action rolled over a firepit. Twice. I am the action roll king
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Just to circumvent as much mood-killing as possible, you are allowed a small amount of laughter at my pubic hair. Too much and I revoke your vagina privileges until you can get your shit together.
PS: when I ask you if I look fat in a a dress DO NOT TAKE YOUR SWEET ASS GAY TIME to formulate an answer only to tell me in front of our family that perhaps I should buy Spanx. Do you WANT me to tell mom and dad you suck cock? Then be a good brother and have the common decency to LIEEEEEE!!!!
We can't stop being roommates, you do such a good job of holding my hair back when I puke. I don't wanna buy hair elastics.
I nicknamed her "Jackhammer" for the way she gave me a handjob. My balls were in constant pain
Yes. Life would be much easier if we had penises & could do whatever the fuck we want.
Did my extra credit for a class I badly need to pass at the bar of Friday's.. kind of sum's up my college career. Got a 90 though.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
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