it always starts out as a suggestion then three hours later I have cum in my eye.
i think of them as a grilled chicken salad and a fried chicken biscuit. obviously Amy is better for me, but when i'm eating her all i can think about is how much better the blonde must taste.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
APPARENTLY giving your friend one of your shoes so that you avoid the no shoes no service rule makes you drunk...
Could someone please explain the rug burn on the right side of my face and do I need a shot of penicillin?
No more margaritas for you. Also, tequila should be reclassified as a hallucinogen.
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
It's like the bat signal. He only texts me when I'm naked.
It's amazing what a couple of orgasms can do for a girls demeanor.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
If I call him daddy should I get him a father's day card? Serious question
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
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