wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Its so akward after he cums on my face. like usually the porn just ends
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
So I wake up this morning with a bottle of dish detergent and a dildo. Good call on bringing those girls from community college.
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
You could sing the national anthem right before we have sex. Make it feel like a sporting event
I don't remember what you did, but I DO remember that i'm supposed to hate you for it.
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I just drunkenly accidentally had sex with my boss
Did you at least ask for a raise?
No but I am now the owner of one of either his or his roomate's teeshirts... Maybe I can use it to negotiate?
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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