College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Passing las posas road. In a world of pain. Im trying to piss in a bottle through the hole in my crotch. I wish i had a bigger dick.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
OMG bikini contest at the bar. You can see this one chicks scar from her c-section and I'm pretty sure she is the best of the bunch.
i tried to knight her with my dick. she said it was unromantic. what an ungrateful attitude for a knight.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
Haha! You know I mean that in a positive way. Like, "let them eat cake!" Or in our case, "let them achieve obesity from the two entree plate at Panda Express!"
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
At least I know that however bad my life gets and how low I can feel I'll never feel shitting in a red robin parking lot low
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
I thought i was doing pretty well but I walked into my first class and everyone on my side of the room immediately asked how drunk and high I was
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