This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
he looks like a really good dad on facebook
suddenly SuperBad didn't seem so funny anymore...she did have her period on my leg.
Dont have access to internet. masturbating to shake weight commercial.
He tried to make eye contact, he should know by now that freaks me out
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
Had "I should be in prison or dead" storytime at the bar. Found out James has done blow off a dead guy. Overwhelmed and speechless.
She was giving me that "well this is awkward since you drunkedly tried to hook up with me" look.
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I'm at a gyno in Japan. Safe to say every possible rule of etiquette is about to be broken. Buckle up, motherfuckers.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
Something like, "Merry Christmas. I hope Santa shits in your mouth."?
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
Randomize
