the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
I literally ate my thanksgiving dinner while getting a lapdance. And honestly, after that, there is no other way.
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
If you don't come out tonight, who's going to wake us up in the morning because they're fucking in the middle of the room where everyones sleeping?
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
I refuse to believe you if you're trying to tell me humanity as a whole isn't sad, tired, and craving Chinese food.
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
LISTEN TO ME! DONDE ESTA LA FUCKING VICODIN!
Randomize
