It was just so hard to get through Conan without crying like a baby. I'm just so proud of him.
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
I'm drinking vodka out of a coffee pot. and i'm not even mad about it
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
We got to the party at eleven, and the host was already in the hospital from being stabbed. And she brought the stabber home with us when we left.
It was like giving head to a cactus.
If your mother gets up on the bar again, I will. The bouncer already had a talk with her earlier.
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
He makes me want to cheat on my other 3 boyfriends..
So i woke up on a park bench... Using my shoe as a pillow, cuddling a empty handle of vodka... Yet I'm still in my living room. Someone please tell me why all my vodkas gone? I'll deal with the park bench situation at a later time.
i woke up on the third floor, naked in a closet.
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