whats wrong with me. i have a coffee mug of wine in the library and i'm doing homework
Just topless shotgunned a bud light alone. I am about to peer mentor the shit out of these freshmen.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
What makeup look will say to the therapist 'I am a smart, well-adjusted young woman'?
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
the guy next to you kind of looks like a penguin. i'm going to fuck him
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
you need to drop off my dinner before you go see him because i'm not gonna wait until you're finished fucking him to get my damn chinese food
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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