Why do girls always cry at the bar?
What's the point of going out if you're going to cry all night?
Are they having an exestensial crisis at the bar?
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
I think i'm just gonna start shot-gunning everything that comes in can form.
How can he have such a manly penis and baby hands?!
Please tell me why there is some girl tied to our toilet?
That just sounds like a recipe for sex in my backyard. Yes.
i sent you a picture of beads you send me a picture of boobs how hard is this to understand
I'm high and reading a Wikipedia article on circumcision procedure. Help.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I literally just smashed open my grade school piggy bank for beer money. Goodbye childhood. Hellllllo coin night.
I keep thinking your bag of thongs is a bag of chips. So mad I can't eat them.
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
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