She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
She asked me to cum on her. ON her. I think we're out of the friend zone
We're listening to the crystal method and doing bong hits for jesus
How are you texting me from 1998?
Just got walked in on while fucking in the lounge in the performing arts building. The janitors gave us five minutes to leave and applauded our exit
Forgot my sound was off and didnt even realize it until halfway through because I thought I could hear it. I think high me just narrated half a clip of adventure time
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Watching the Walking Dead, snuggled up naked, and drinking a beer. No better way.
If ever there was a tweet to describe your life, it's this.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
He sent me a picture of his dick as a snake, I'd say things are going great.
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
we should paint friendship bongs
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Going to the eye doctors drunk makes you feel like your doing a sobriety test! They have to know..
Randomize
