Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
She's in Spain. I'm in Holland. World Cup Final is Sunday.
Dude, it's like the Romeo and Juliet of FIFA.
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
You were doing karaoke. Then you screamed "SHOUTOUT TO ADAM LAMBERT" and started making out with the very surprised looking guy next to you.
Saw a guy pass out and hit his head on a urinal. Laughing too hard to help him up
you can now officially say a girl has shaved your initials into her pubes. welcome to the club.
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
I don't know whether to laugh it off or be pissed at him..I got pulled over this morning leaving his place and the officer thought my hickeys were hand prints around my neck and asked if I needed to be escorted out of town.
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Randomize
