Damn I can't remmbre the last tome I had sobr sex
Um. I believe with my boyfriend, slut
Fuck. Wron person. But yea
Yea. The knew something was up when i told them i had to go pick up goat milk and and and a roasted chicken at 2 am
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
I just want you to know I tipped the cab driver $10 last night because I felt bad that he didn't have healthcare.
As soon as the judge read that I rear ended the car from getting roadhead he chuckled. You know he's been there before.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
He has in a pan: ten pieces of bacon, two cloves of garlic, an egg (not scrambled or hard boiled, just an egg) and frozen corn.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
I'm sure it's not the worst thing to ever come out of my ass
I'm all for hockey players but dude, he asked me to lick his chipped tooth mid-hook up.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Randomize
