The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
but i got with him after midnight so its technically 2 days
he has been on a 2 week bender, has been homeless for a week and a half, and leaves for madagascar in 2 days. Do we worry or is that normal?
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
There's a homeless man outside the bar. I have a toothbrush and toothpaste in my car. I think i'm going to give them to him. And they said drinking is bad.
You're so thoughtful.
Fuck that. I'm not afraid to die. I'll prove you can survive on a bagel bites and rum diet.
i fucking swear, saying shit like "i dont get jealous" is like personally inviting your slutty friend to fuck the guy you slept with like a month ago
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
New rule: if you don't think racism exists, you don't get to put your penis inside me.
This morning when you were fucking me you said you'd go to the store and get me tampons and a 30 pack
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
Almost gave the delivery guy a 34 dollar tip. That high
when you come over can you bring tequila and my birth control? Thanks girl!
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