sorry i'm running a bit late. had to shave my brittney...was looking more like rapunzel. clearly i've been having a drought.
I knew you were gonna be a good wingman when the words "dibs on the chunky one" came out of your mouth.
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Im in search of the perfect penis, it would be unethical for me not to test run them.
but he gave me mouthwash after the bj. no ones ever done that for me before.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
Just lifeguarded a kid's party hungover so I could afford to go out drinking tonight. Circle of life shit goin on here.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I'm naked on my couch and just ate a chip that was in my belly button.. my 20s have been weird.
Randomize
