Do you think an esthetician would be willing to wax the Chanel Cs into my crotch? That way, whenever a guy gets ready to pound on it I can go "Careful, it's Chanel."
I either date the nice guys or the assholes. There isn't any in between.
You need to find a taint.
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I want something that's relevant to him banging her right after I did. Like "runner-up"
Tell your boss that he's keeping you from eating a fuck sundae off of these 36-24-36 34 D's waiting for you at home on Valentine's Day.
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
I'm giving great sideboob & it's being wasted on my parents.
he calls himself the gay cupid because he matches two guys looking to hookup on craigstlist with each other. get me out of here. please.
WHEN DO I FOLLOW THESE PEOPLE. I WOKE UP THIS MORNING &FOUND TWEETS FROM ILLUMINATI AND "hot shot 6th grader"
It's a fucking menopause festival down here at the strike zone
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
You offered the police officer a Snickers ice cream bar and cried when he wouldn't take it...
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
So it turns out strippers do encores if enough people yell. Encore song: Self Esteem.
Yeah that was post sex. I was thinking in my mind, no wonder he didnt ask me to call him daddy since he actually is a dad
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