omg, I know. It's so embarrassing that we've both had his penis in parts of our bodies
Hey a mouth doesn't really count. A vagina counts more.
He asked me to grab his balls and yell "thats a spicy meat-a-ball" Last time I do requests.
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I might lose an organ but I've got booze. I'll be fine.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
I just puked in my courtyard and dripped toothpaste in my chest hair. You better be getting laid or this drunk is wasted.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
You have such a talent for this
Friendship, or finding weed?
Yes
Randomize
