So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
She said to delete the bj video, but I accidentally hit the 'send to her bf' button. My bad
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
We were coming but I found wine on my way out the door.
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
She told me she loved my new hairstyle. I told her its called head head.
You don't understand. My ass is the color of eggplant.
The girl in line in front of me at the grocery store is buying wine, m&m minis, a toothbrush, and condoms. Is it inappropriate to high-five her?
After my shift today I'm going on a bender. Not saying this so you'll stop me, just a heads up to invest in Tylenol, Gatorade, and Jack
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
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