watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
this morning i checked my reflection in the toilet as i was throwing up to make sure i still had my pearl earrings on
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Let's discuss options later this evening. I'll draw out said options and compare and contrast the "accessibility" of the costume for quickies. Because you never know. Halloween is full of surprises. I'll also compare practicality, level of skank, and creative features.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
I'm gonna cougar town the shit out of that prom.
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I never thought I would be saying these words but...when did David Spade get hot?
He makes balloon animals that get you high? Hell yeah invite him over!
I should be trashily making out with an air force cadet in the beach volleyball court by now
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
dude. I can hear the air.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
You did what with his pubic hair?
Randomize
