just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
We are gonna be 90 years old in wheelchairs at the nursing home sitting at computers poking each other and waiting for the other to die so we will have the last facebook poke.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
I had 5 long islands and 2 alien brain hemorrhages…I am entirely certain that the "power hour to finish the night" idea was just too much.
She just tricked me into telling her the balance of my 401k... She's like a gold digging jedi mind trick ninja
This storm betta not fuck with taco tuesday
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Should I tell this TSA agent his fly is down while he is trying to hit on this chick?
Whatever. I have his dick. Haha how many girls can say they have a dildo replica of a guy they were seeing
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
i sent him a picture of his friend's dick and told him he should really stop thinking he's my only option.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
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