what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
I'm not saying going to the volleyball games drunk on Tuesday night was a bad idea I'm just saying we shouldn't make a routine of it.
It feels like I've shaved away my winter coat and my vagina is going to freeze if I go outside.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
I don't care if he's straight, his cock will be in my mouth by midnight. Like a closeted Cinderella.
Using Michelob Ultra as champagne.
We got the DJ into it too! "If there are any dudes into other dudes out there, my man mark is looking to get pounded. Buy him a drink stat!"
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
jen just told me ur idea of revenge was saluting while letting his bong float away while attached to some balloons.
Apparently there's nothing on sonza for "giving a handjob while sunbathing"
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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