Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
Unfortunately, they didn't pull of their wake and bake plans. Instead, they waked and vomited like a half-retarded giraffe till everyone woke up.
Playing the biology drinking game in my 8am. Drink everytime he says species or organism. I love st. Patricks day
Yeah, but there's no serving sizes for dick.
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
It's like past high you was looking out for future high you by rolling that joint and leaving it in your coat pocket. What a Halloween miracle
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I declared today 'Have a Bloody Mary Naked Day'. Why? Because I'm hungover, thirsty & don't want to bother putting on clothes.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
He was the highest I've ever seen. Almost had him convinced there are only three colors in the rainbow...
If he doesn't get here soon I'm taking off my thong and eating his dinner.
we are not getting arrested this weekend. I don't care who I have to blow its just not happening.
i just swapped my iPhone for a happy meal. this is greg btw, the hooker let me borrow her phone
Greetings from Florida; the armpit of the US, where my 240something lb brother nearly got carried away by some aggressive woodland mosquitoes. I was only spared because they could probably sense I was currently semi-disassociating and would not feel the suffering their presence wrought.
Anyway, how was your day?
Randomize
