He called me an ungrateful bitch because I lauged when he asked me "how do you me and a bed sound?"
Like I should be grateful for the 5 minutes I sit on top of him and stare at the wall.
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
I tried making the sex a little better this time so right before I blew I yelled "ready or not here I come!"
there's nothing like watching the sun rise at the library alone on a friday morning to make you want to kill yourself.
You should know me better than that. I don't whore around. I promise this is a blowjobs only kind of trip.
If I should ask "why am I still single?" could someone please remind me of shooting mike and ikes out of my nose at the bartender last Saturday. many thanks
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
Do they make liter beers?
They make 40s
Do they make 2 liter beers
They make 2 40s
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I just jerked him off with one hand while holding my wine glass with the other and watching Congo. I feel like this was a preview to my married life...
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
So do I get points for screwing my recently single ex boyfriend and then telling him to go fight for his ex back?
Randomize
