why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I just snorted a line of adderall through a rolled up business card for the Michigan Law Admissions Office.... Tell me I'm not motivated
last night they convinced you that a sharpie was a new style of chap stick... so when you wake up, you might want to do something about that
Just called my mom. She definitely saw all those fb statuses so thanks for that.
Haha did she know what fisting meant?
Yeah. Which is upsetting in itself
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
And for the fourth year in a row Christmas has ended in tears, yelling and me drinking. This is officially our longest running Christmas tradition.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I accidentally mass texted his dick pic. Not only to my friends, but to my dad as well...
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I'm not saying I love you. I never said I love you. I said that if earth blew up like Krypton you'd be the only person I would like to have inside me when our bodies burn up in a fiery inferno
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
Randomize
