YOu come back ASAP and we will do whatever you want baby
guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
We walked in and they were fucking to Somewhere Over the Rainbow... I need a new roommate.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Tried to steal a keytar from my hook up's house.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
They are gonna stay together and get married and have 2 children before he wakes up and realizes that there is more to life than anal
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Why make bad decisions when I can watch you?
Fyi - we're going to be eating those sandwiches in bed when you get home.
HE LIVES IN ANOTHER STATE
actually scratch that last text, he's the perfect boyfriend. He stays faithful and doesnt find out about all the guys here. it's a win-win
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
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