: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
the non-midget kid sent 8,000 texts in a month. the midget parents are pissed. THIS IS EPIC WHEN YOUR HIGH.
time for a it's-monday-night-and-this-week-is-gunna-suck-drink.
I had to physically hold you down to stop you from going out the window naked. You put up quit the struggle.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
You got into a heated argument about Frankenstein's intelligence while double fisting burritos from taco bell.
Maybe it was that imaginary ghost dick you were stuffing in your mouth a minute ago
You called me to pick you up from the bar at 9:00. When we drove over the speed bumps you put your hands in the air and pretended you were on a roller coaster.
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
I behisseth at your soul from the deepest darkest depths of the earth
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I came twice AND he sent me home with edibles. I think he’s a keeper.
Randomize