I have to tell you about my conversation with the cloud dragon!
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Day two of taking my adderall. I just organized the pantry and alphabetized my dvds. I've missed my mind on drugs
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
2nd night home for break and we had to call the fire department to keep the house from burning down. At this rate I'll be lucky to see you next semester.
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
And I'm not sure if that's how you pluralize penis. Never planned on needing to know that in my life.
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
you said you didn't want to carry the pizza box so just folded up the pizza and put it in your pocket
I recently had a rabies scare because I thought putting socks on my hands to pick up a squirrel that got in my house was a good idea.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
Randomize