When I went to court, my judge's name was Honorable Ball. I couldn't stop laughing.
that probably didn't help your case.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
she has tattoo'd to her hips "grip here" this is why they made spring break
Sometimes I think that I have too much self esteem
Then I realize that I'm just really fucking pretty.
Well, I didn't bring a notebook or any paper to class. Should I take notes on the sugar packet, lace thong, or condom wrapper that instead are in my school bag?
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
He doesn't care. He wouldn't care if my vag grew arms and smacked him in the face.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Definitely the only person to buy 2 handles a 2 bottles of champagne & 3 thirties while wearing a fanny pack
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
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