Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
We need to get cat food
Nevermind, the cat will eat lucky charms
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
Showing up at the grocery store at 5am to have the clerk sprint to the condom cabinet waiving the keys because you told him to hurry it was an emergency
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
Seriously, you can't give someone's wife an orgasm on the dance floor of a gay nightclub and then hang out with her husband the following week
A big toe in my vag is not foreplay.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
I will be wearing a suit out more cuz it has been decided i rage harder with a power tie
You can now call me Rabbi, and I can now perform weddings, funerals, and other services in all fifty states. You're welcome, world.
Didn't think I'd be dancing with the Power Rangers but here I am
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