what do you mean I googled how to give an awesome blow job?
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
I started drinking at 10.30am. Ive got a solid buzz, ive decided holidays are to be treated like gamedays
i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
im probably shirtless right now with a bottle of jack watching horton hears a who. this is a judgement free zone.
Well, at first I was really confused. But then I realized that he was talking from his penis's perspective... in third person.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
I need to stop acting like a porn star that isn't getting paid
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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