moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
my hot student got the clitoris wrong on the lab practical...so it kinda makes me not want to pursue it
just because he can't find it on a cat, doesn't mean he can't find it on you
Some guy just bought a handle of cuervo, a curling iron, and a power drill. Paid with a jar of change. I'm torn between avoiding him and befriending him..
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
Go big or go home. i snuck in two beers in my bra. im here to win.
He just sent me a picture of himself naked while cooking pancakes and he made the caption "bitchin' in the kitchen"
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
It's always great when the guy I get pills from sends me an email that says "I know you will get clean it's going to be hard but I know you can do it"
Stories. There's stories.
MEGHAN YOU'VE BEEN THERE FOR 20 MINUTES
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Randomize
