I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
I bought a bottle of 100 proof for the storm. I am going to drink until I pass out. I'm taking bets. 1:30 pm is the over/under.
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
Damn, it's been so long since I had sex I could use the cobwebs from my vagina to decorate for Halloween.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
Find me a date. With a beard. I want him to rub his beard on my tits. I'm not even into that stuff but I think it'd be so warm.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I can't talk to her. I know entirely too much about her genitals to hold a conversation without mentioning them.
I'm hungry
Come here to eat and play. It'll be like Dave and Busters except with sex
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
...You tried to use your wallet to call her after you gave your cell phone to the cab driver as a "peace offering"
Seriously. I'm like, "Wait, we are actually talking about physics in the middle of sex and its ACTUALLY erotic because you're so fucking intelligent I'm turned on?"
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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