If you were a Panda and I were a Koala and we had a baby, it'd be a falafel. Just think about that.
Emee failed...She used my genitals as a tampon
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Its as if he has to do the exact opposite of what I tell him. Don't come in my eye, pfshh it's in my eye. Don't come on the cat, pfshh it's on the cat.
It was literally me in an evening gown and him in a tux with six bottles of Vodka at Jons.
And this was for your brother's Christening?
We have a hundred jello shots. Lines will be crossed.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
well hes been the bathroom for like 15 mins so he either feels comfortable enough to puke/ shit in my apartment or he escaped out the window
You came running into my room at 4 in the morning yelling "SANCTUARY!" and flung yourself into bed.
Hmmm, sounds like a Jaeger night then. Did I at least get to be the little spoon?
Also lets pinky promise right now that we will NOT play "Pony" outside of each other's rooms if we have a hook up over
She said she was sorry for rolling around in her own vomit. Honestly, I thought it really added to the party.
Yea he was still drunk. He wore a Toga to his job interview.
He was my first marine! I wanna remember his name!
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize
