she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I swallowed and made him pancakes in the morning. I feel almost as desperate as Jennifer Aniston at this point.
The panties match.
I'll be right there.
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
I might attempt to pee into a cup while driving. I'll let you know how it goes.
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Anyone would get lost in that field after that much vodka. Trust me... I kind of feel like superman considering I even made it home. Most people would've been face down in a random oilfield. Not this guy.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
Gatorade without vodka just doesn't taste the same
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize